“We are human BEings not human DOings.”
John Bradshaw, Healing the Shame that Binds You
“We are human beings, not human doings” is a quote that is attributed to having been said by a number of individuals. Regardless of who said it first, the message behind the quote is the same: we, as humans, are not meant to constantly just do do do. We are meant to be - to exist, to experience.
Too often we find ourselves determined to always do something, anything! We shame ourselves and others when we are not doing enough. Judgement is projected on those individuals who are not doing enough as being lazy, lacking motivation, a do-nothing (see what I did there?). We allow others to tell us that if we aren’t doing enough, then we are not enough.
So why is it that we feel uncomfortable just allowing ourselves to be? Instinctively, the human mind does not rest. It is constantly in motion and generating thoughts, ideas, reacting to behaviors, and engaging with the world around us. Our brains hardly allow us the opportunity to slow down.
I often have the experience of walking with other people and they are always moving at a much faster pace than I am. They will scold me for not keeping up with them, but I often recounted with “why not slow down and take in the world around you?” I intentionally and consciously take my steps slower than others (not just because I am short, but) so that I can fully absorb what is happening around me and give myself time to acknowledge the world that I live in. Now, if I’m in a hurry to get somewhere because I am running late (which I don’t like to do), then sure, I will speed up a bit. But if I am walking to the entrance of the supermarket or my local Home Depot, I do not find it necessary to rush for the door.
Taking a moment to just be is as simple as checking in with all of your 5 senses: What do you see?, What do you hear?, What can you smell?, Do you taste something?, What are you touching? Akin to a practice in mindfulness, checking in with your five senses gives a moment to acknowledge and recognize what state of being you are currently in. Just being can also allow an individual to identify how they are feeling in that moment - recognizing, acknowledging, and experiencing that feeling. This is being. In the course of being you may be doing something, but first and foremost, just be.
